Queen recieves messages about an Alien Invasion

Artist's conception of what the invasion would have looked like.  Courtesy of The BBC.

Artist’s conception of what the invasion would have looked like.
Courtesy of The BBC.

All right, I’ve got several possible ideas for things to post about, and, for now, I’ve decided to go with a Weird News/Music News alternation. And there’s been several themes I could be kicking about from hospitalities on Ben Nevis to stupid criminals to passport troubles to sheep-eating plants, so I’ve decided on a theme that should hold near and dear to the hearts of many of the Whovians on the site: Aliens.Recently, there’s been a series of messages from UFOlogists to several key figures, ranging from cabinet members to the Queen herself, sent between 2007 to 2009 revealed by the National Archives.

One message in particular came from a UFO researcher in Victoria, Australia, sent in March 2009, addressed directly to “Your Majesty Queen Elizabeth II”.The message started by saying that: “I am writing to you to inform you Madam that the British Government continues to refuse to reveal the truth behind their files and reports of Unidentified Flying Objects (UFOs).He continued to insist that there were more to UFOs than “weather balloons, airplanes, helicopters, lights, or natural phenomena.” He claimed to try to contact various UK government departments, from the RAF, MoD to MI5, to convince them of the gravity of the situation. He added,  “As I am writing this letter to you Your Majesty, I contemplate whether or not you will see reason and if you will choose to act Madam? As a UFO researcher, I must highly recommend you act now Your Majesty. You are capable of deciding your own destiny. The question is Your Majesty, which path will you choose? I await your immediate action and response to this serious UFO issue. I have the honour to be, Madam, Your Majesty’s humble and obedient servant.”

Buckingham Palace replied as follows:  “Although this is not a matter in which Her Majesty would intervene, the letter has been passed to the Secretary of State for Defence, so that this approach to the Queen may be known and consideration given to the points raised in the letter.”

Also, the MoD replied that, as important as the defense of UK airspace was, there was no evidence that the UFOs were a threat to national security.

Of course, as anyone who’s read Roald Dahl’s work knows, there’s a very simple protocol for getting the Queen involved in paranormal matters:

  • Hack into her brain while she’s asleep and give her a nightmare about aliens.
  • Break into her bedroom while she’s asleep, and when she wakes, talk about the dream and the reality behind it.
  • Take care of the threat.
  • Create a giant omlet.

Another letter, written to Gordon Brown in 2008, said: “Following the release of the UFO files by the Ministry of Defence, does the prime minister now feel it is time to take a more active role in this subject. I don’t believe a prime ministerial position in Britain is enough to have knowledge of extra terrestrial life etc but feel that now public interest in this subject is at an all time high it would be a good time to show more governmental involvement, thus inspiring the electorate and winning the hearts and minds of the public.” It also advised the PM to handle it professionally, lest the UK become a laughingstock.

Remarkably, given Robbie Williams’ high-profile Britishness and love for UFOs, he has had nothing to say about this.

This release comes on the heels of an interview by Simon Parkes, a councillor for Stakesby in Whitby on Channel 4 that he has been carrying on an affair with extra-terrestrials for several decades. I could tell you more, but I fear that Jonathan would not approve; the details are too disturbing. All I have to say about that is that I wish more American politicians were this bonkers. It would make C-Span more interesting.

Comments

  1. avatarretnavybrat says

    If the Queen ever wanted a little extra pocket money to donate to charity, perhaps she should have a book published that features all the offbeat and/or cute letters she’s received over her reign. : D

  2. avatarJoshua says

    The royal family has known about this for quite some time now. What I would like to see is, the office of the Prime Minister grow some balls and quit kissing the heels of America.
    I know they want to keep good relations with their allies, and thus have to adhere to certain agreements, however it’s been well over 60 years of lies, my God man, the deception has gone on long enough! Internationally, people are more connected and aware than ever before.
    I remember when England was a leader, but these days it seems they just nod along with everything spewed out the mouth of the U.S. government. Bark when they say to, roll over when they say to. Mind you, it’s not just England but most of the world as well. My own country’s social and diplomatic system was heavily influenced by England, and yet now, they dolorously follow America in their ways when trying to implement new economic change.
    If we’re painting broad brushstrokes, the English have always been known for their candidness, I’d hate to see brazen lies kill what little faith is left between a government, and it’s people.