Dispatches from the East: Same Old Story

So check this out.  Norwich is old.  I mean, really old.  We’re talking invaded by actual Vikings on longboats in the 9th century old.  There are Roman roads here, for Pete’s sake.  They’re not in very good shape, sure, but they’re here.  And for a Kansas kid who grew up thinking the founding of America 250-ish years ago was about as old as history could get, it’s pretty hard to get your head around.

A ten minute walk from my flat takes me to the old city gates, which date from the 12th-13th century.  Only a few sections remain, and they’re understandably not in particularly good shape, but it is an interesting and constant reminder as you walk by that your city is steeped in a history that included having to have walls to keep invaders out.  I kind of wish they hadn’t let them go to ruin, sure, a full set of city walls and gates would be a nightmare for traffic and transportation (which are bad enough as it is), but you could have a great time with the city tourism slogans -Norwich: Visit if you think you’re Tough Enough!, or Norwich: Vikings Stay Out!  A full set of city walls could also be great for keeping out the citizens of Ipswich, the scariest place on Earth.  Plus, let’s be honest, although it rarely happens anymore, you’d be ready if Viking’s did attack, and with pirates currently on the rise, it’s only a matter of time before being a Viking raider is back in vogue.

Norwich Cathedral, well worth seeing if you like things that are really old, dates from about the 12th century.   That’s so old!  It’s in much better shape than the city walls, being ‘still-an-actual-working-building’ type thing instead of a ‘busted-up-rocky-ruin’, and as you walk around it, you think ‘at the time when this huge thing was completed, the average life span was thirty-five, the French could actually fight, Norwich was the 2nd biggest city in the country, and people ran around on horses wearing plate armor and trying to skewer each other’.  Which, let’s face it, is a far cooler history than ‘a bunch of religious fanatics who arrived on boats wearing all black and who were too stupid to plant corn.’

Next to the cathedral is the Adam & Eve pub, which bills itself as ‘Probably the oldest pub in Norwich’, a testament to it’s modesty (or a clever attempt to escape historical accuracy).  The Adam & Eve was set up by the monks at the cathedral to give the workers who built the cathedral a place to go after work.  It’s like a Medival Cheers, with monks.  Sadly, monks don’t frequent the Adam & Eve anymore, it’s mostly students, who are kind of like monks in that neither ever have any money.

Down from the cathedral is Elm Hill, another old place.  The longest consecutive stretch of Tudor era housing in the country, it is decrepit that even someone from Hollywood thought it was old enough to put in a movie!  The movie, Stardust, has Robert DeNiro in it, who is pretty old.  But not as old as Elm Hill.  How old is it?  When Elm Hill was new, Henry VIII may have been as young as Jonathan Rhys Meyers looks in The Tudors.

Sometimes the new combines with the old–like Castle Mall.  It’s a mall, built below a castle.  You can marvel at the great 15th century keep, while making sure you get bargain priced clothing at H&M.  That’s right, even shopping in Norwich is a historical experience!  The other mall, Chapelfield mall, has a chruch next to it, a church old enough to have several gravestones in the churchyard.  The Chapelfield Mall planners weren’t able to get permission to remove the graveyard, so as you walk in and out of the mall you go just past a KFC, a Starbucks, and THE GRAVES OF THE 18TH CENTURY DEAD.  It’s hard to imagine a more pleasureable shopping experience.  And not one you’d get in Kansas.

So when people ask me what I love most about England, it’s the same old story.  All the old stuff.